What’s something you’ve never told anyone?

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Here is the story of a person telling his secrets which he has never told anyone.

Well, I suppose this is an appropriate moment to share.

1. I am a liar — and I convince myself I am telling the truth even when I know deep down its BS. Starting around 2013, I lied by omission and never opened up to people about my personal life. It would have been appropriate given the context, but instead, I pretended to create an identity to fit the situation. Even now, I find myself having to explain myself, and having to lie in situations which I don’t feel comfortable lying.

2. I am lazy — despite graduating from college, my work ethic is awful. I barely broke a sweat, procrastinated, played video games, and overall, I lacked the determination to improve. Finishing with a 2.78-grade point average taught me a lesson. Take advantage of the opportunity, because I may regret it shortly. I am sorry it now. I choose an easier major, and now I am unable to find a job with a livable salary. If I worked harder, choose a STEM major or even business, I would have been well on my way to plateauing. Instead, I type this from my parent’s kitchen and still rely on mom and dad financially.

3. I am passive aggressive and have anxiety — because I was bullied from 5th grade, all the way up to my last day of class in 12th grade. My father also physically abused me while in grade school. Due to my childhood trauma, I have a hard time dealing with situations. I have a hard time being honest, afraid of confrontation, and have a hard time making decisions. As far as the anxiety, If I am placed in an awkward situation, I often get sweaty palms and have to use the restroom. I believe this is associated with my angst of being unable to make decisions and worry about offending.

4. I don’t like my parents — because of the years of abuse; I find it hard to rekindle any relationship with them at 26. My father beat me, and my mother condoned his actions. Right now, I am currently fake to keep the peace. As much as I would like to be honest with myself, I refuse to engage in an argument over trivial topics. I hope at some point I can look past my childhood, and have a positive relationship with them.

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